I lost my job due to a layoff last year and have been working hard to find a new job. I network, I apply, I reach out to people I know. I have made it pretty far in the interview process with a few companies, and I am feeling worn down by the whole process.
It feels like every company requires four rounds and some even want me to create a presentation. Why do I need to talk to so many people? I end up feeling defeated when I go through the whole process just to hear ‘we decided to go with another candidate’. I’m getting to the point where I feel resentful and want to throw my hands up in the air!
Feeling fatigued
Hi Fatigued. It’s a tough time to be out looking for work. I certainly hear your frustration about putting so much effort in and not getting the outcome.
I can’t make the job search easier or shorter, but I can share mindset shifts that might make the process a bit more enjoyable.
Reframe #1 - you only need to find one job
Yes, there are layoffs happening and thousands of talented people are losing their jobs. Yes, there are concerns about the availability of jobs and where all those people are going. Yes, there are rumblings about a recession.
All these are real issues and they all matter on a macro scale. The total pool of jobs is shrinking and the total pool of people who need jobs is increasing. If you were solving for everyone who needed a job at the moment, it would matter A LOT.
However, for you as an individual, what matters is micro in nature. You just need one job (the right job at the right company), but it’s only one. Based on the fact that you are applying for jobs and you are interviewing, you know that jobs do exist in the world.
Try not to let the broader economic or job environment seep into your own mindset. You don’t need all the jobs, you need one. This isn’t the time to solve for world peace, just your own needs.
Reframe #2 - you have done this before
This isn’t your first time finding employment. Even if it has been a while, you have the skills to find a job.
As a quick exercise, make a list of all the times you needed a job and all the jobs you found. Note how you found them (applying online, in person, through your network, etc). Remember how long the process was and the level of effort required to get to the end outcome.
The purpose is to remind yourself that you have all the skills to land a great job. You went through the steps, you tried different strategies, and ultimately you were successful.
The landscape and tools may have changed, but the core of the process hasn't. You find an opportunity, vet the opportunity, go through the interview process, negotiate the offer, etc. . You have what you need to get to the other side of this.
Reframe #3 - the interview process is two-sided
The outcome of the job-seeking process is to find a candidate and a role/company that are a good match. To that end, both sides use the interview process to gather information about match potential.
To get the most out of the process - make sure you know what information is important to you. Make a list of what matters most after the basics (a paycheck/benefits).
Is it about having a compelling vision, a strong collaborative culture, a manager who invests in you? Figure out your top things and use the recruiting conversations to dig into each one. Gather information so that you will be able to make an informed decision.
If you notice that something is not meeting your needs during the process, it is time to gracefully bow out. Don’t force yourself into a bad situation because you are frustrated and tired. Do your best to keep your energy up and find the fit that works for you.
Reframe #4 - interview conversations can be fun
At their core, interviews are conversations - you get to learn about someone new, and they get to learn about you.
Try to think about interviews as what they actually are: discussions about an interesting topic. Sometimes that interesting topic is you, and sometimes the topic is a problem you get to solve (either by presenting a solution, sharing an example or doing a case together).
I used to dislike interviewing because I had trouble remembering specific details about projects. I know…I should keep better notes.
Then I discovered case and presentation interviews and realized how fun it can be to get a novel problem and work on it as part of the interview.
With a case, you solve the problem together. With a presentation, you solve the problem and then share your concepts with experts who can push your thinking even further.
If you like solving problems, these can be fun (if you aren’t sitting there sweating bullets).
As you go into an interview, remind yourself that you are simply having a conversation with a new person. It might help release some of the pressure you have built up in your mind.
Not a reframe: taking care of your mind and body
Before the interview, try to keep your stress hormones down. They are going to show up, that is guaranteed. What you can do is burn the fuel. Do push-ups or burpees. Flood your body with excitement hormones and then let them subside. Breathe deeply.
One of my hacks before a case interview is to do long-hand math problems on a piece of paper. Not because they help me perform in the interview, but because they force me to concentrate on something besides being nervous. The math also switches my brain into logic mode.
It can be tiring to be ‘on’ for long periods. Try to schedule recovery time after interviews, don’t go back-to-back unless absolutely necessary. Give yourself a buffer and go for a walk, have a cup of tea, or something that gets your mind and body out of ‘interview mode’.
Try these reframes to give you the resilience needed to make it through the grueling process and find your next great job.
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